


You're My Refuge

by Nehanshika_524



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Confessions, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Season 4, just really sappy and sweet, light angst though, s4 spoilers!!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-28
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-10 13:31:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13502504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nehanshika_524/pseuds/Nehanshika_524
Summary: You know it's trueI see a shelter in youAnd all the times that we've been throughOh baby, you're my refugeIn which Lance finds out what Keith was going to do, and Keith comes to terms with why he did it.





	You're My Refuge

**Author's Note:**

> !!!S4 SPOILERS!!!  
>  also- written pre-S5. As in, it just came out and i havent seen it yet, but I wrote this like, months beforehand. anyway, enjoy!

When Keith returned to the Castle of Lions, he registered three things:

 

  1. The bright, familiar light of the bridge.
  2. A sudden, desperate cry of “KEITH!!!”
  3. A blur of movement, and then a pair of arms wrapping tightly around him.



 

Keith’s breath caught, and his heart seized. Time seemed to still. A moment passed, and Keith knew he was supposed to hug back, but…

Lance began to say something, but before he could, the rest of the team practically leapt at Keith, enveloping him in a hug. They all laughed and smiled, saying things like “It’s good to have you back,” and “We missed you, Keith!”.

Keith’s heart felt… warm. He felt safe, protected. He realised for the first time that the whole team really did care about him, and that they had… well, accepted him. Yeah, that was the feeling. Accepted. It was like being accepted by a family.

 _...Is this what it’s like to actually_ have _a family?_

When they all finally pulled away from Keith, Lance held on for just a moment longer, murmuring “We gotta talk, okay?” before letting go.

They all talked for a while, telling Keith what had happened whilst he was away with the Blades, Keith in turn telling about his missions and the discoveries they’d made. But Lance hung back from the group slightly. Eventually, he yawned dramatically, saying “As amazing as it is to have you back with us, I’m beat. G’night, guys.”

He glanced meaningfully at Keith, before leaving the room to find his own. Keith made up his own excuse, and followed.

He stood outside Lance’s door, and knocked lightly. “Lance? You needed to talk to--”

Lance’s door burst open, and he threw his arms around Keith, holding him tight, as if he couldn’t bear to let go. Keith’s heart skipped several beats.

Lance buried his face into Keith’s hair for a moment, and Keith froze, feeling him shake. Was he… crying?

“What were you thinking?! You could’ve gotten yourself killed!” Lance pulled away, his hands falling to meet Keith’s. Oh, God, he _was_ crying. “Lance, I just… wanted to stop Haggar. I thought if I flew at the shield, it’d break, and--”

“ _That’s_ what you did?!” He gasped. “You were going to fly into the fucking shield? Matt told us you had a close call, but not… not... Oh, God, _Keith._ ”

He felt a pang of guilt. “I…”

“What if it hadn’t _worked_ , Keith? What if you d… What if it was for no reason, huh? W-what then?” His voice broke. “What then?! We would have lost you!”

Keith began to tear up, too. The true weight of what he had done- what he had _nearly_ done, was _about_ to really do- finally hit him in full force, a hammer against his heart and head. What _was_ he thinking? He was going to kill himself, _sacrifice_ himself to try and stop Haggar? He was three seconds away from dying in a fiery explosion in a horrible plan that might not even have worked?

Was he that afraid of being seen as selfish? So afraid, he’d turn himself into a martyr?

He hugged Lance back, tightly. “I’m sorry, Lance, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry…”

They stayed like that a while, Lance’s body wracked with sobs, Keith trembling, failing to hold back his own tears. Slowly, their crying began to subside, and they simply stood there, in the dark hallway, rocking gently back and forth in each other’s arms. “Don’t do that again.” Lance murmured into Keith’s shoulder. “Please. What you did was--”

“...Selfish?” Keith guessed.

“What? No,” Lance said. Then he understood, and held Keith a little tighter. “Oh, man… you aren’t selfish, Keith. it was the most selfless thing anyone could do. It was just… dumb. There’s such a thing as being _too_ selfless, you know?” He said softly. “You don’t need to pull away from us. We care about you, Keith.” They pulled apart, and Lance looked up at him. “I- Well, I care about you.” Then he glanced away, as if abashed.

Keith looked at him, fighting the urge to wrap him up in his arms again, to feel Lance’s heart beating against his own, the tickle of his hair against his cheek-- _Keith, stop it. Stop._

Instead, he just said “I care about you too, I just…”

“Why did you do it?” His voice was low. “Why did you nearly kill yourself? And don’t give me that ‘I wanted to stop Haggar’ B.S.,” he said as Keith began to speak. “Tell me why you’ve been pulling so far away from us. Tell me why you left.”

At that, Keith was the one to look away. “...You’re smart. You already figured out why.” He mumbled.

“Just tell me the truth, okay? Please.”

“Fine.” He stood up a little straighter, looking Lance in the eyes. “I did it because I was scared. I did it because I don’t want to burden all of you. I left before you could leave me. ‘You’ being the team,” he said quickly. “I- I left because… you were all rejecting me, I knew it. So I left before anyone could say it. And then… I thought… Sacrificing myself was the only way to stop Hag-- to save Voltron. Save you.”

Keith’s heart seemed to beat loudly in the silence. He knew Lance had known why- of course he had. He knew Lance had tried to make him stay. He knew he’d been trying to tell Keith that he _needed_ him, that the team needed him. He just ignored it. He didn’t want a reason to stay. He didn’t want to get closer to Lance, because he knew what would eventually happen; he’d leave.

Everyone did. They always did.

Lance looked up at him, a strange expression on his face. It was soft, unguarded. It was yearning and odd. Keith couldn’t for the life of him figure out what it meant, so he just stayed silent. Waited for Lance to speak up first.

“You’re an idiot, Keith.”

_...Huh?_

“You’re an idiot,” Lance said again, his eyes glittering- those blue eyes, those ocean-like eyes, those beautifully blue eyes that Keith lost himself in- and smiled. “But you’re my friend. So I’m glad we didn’t… lose you, buddy. The hell did you get the idea we were rejecting you?” Playfully, he hit Keith’s shoulder. “We love you, man.”

Keith’s chest tightened. _That hurts, Lance._ But he smiled back, ignoring the bittersweet feelings attacking his heart. “Thanks… sharpshooter.” He said. Lance’s eyes widened a fraction- and his smile turned into a grin. “Anytime, samurai.”

Their words held meanings that neither of them picked up on. Both were deep in thought, though neither realised the other was thinking the same thing: _God, I love him._ And they stayed for a moment, standing in front of each other, hearts pounding, full of words that neither had the courage to say, so close, so close, and so far.

Both yearned to say something. Both longed to confess, and, for a moment, one of them considered it- then, he turned to leave, locking those feelings deep within his chest, deciding not to be… an idiot.

“I should… I should go to bed, I guess. Thanks, Lance--”

Then the other realised that if he couldn’t find words, actions would do. He grabbed Keith’s hand, breathed the word " _Wait. "_  He stepped closer, watched Keith’s violet eyes widen, his breathing quicken. His own pulse raced. He leaned in, closed his eyes… paused, for a split second, to wonder if he was making a mistake, to worry about the consequences…

Lance ignored the thoughts, closed the distance between him and Keith, and their lips met. It was gentle, and soft, almost a question. Suddenly afraid of its answer, Lance almost pulled away, but was stopped when Keith slowly wrapped his arms around him, kissing back.

That feeling was golden. Lance felt like a firework had gone off in his heart; Keith felt like he was soaring. Suddenly, laughter bubbled up, and then Lance began laughing too, and they had to pull apart just to catch their breath. Both of them slid to the floor, the sounds of their voices echoing throughout the castle corridor.

Slowly, their laughter quietened into glowing smiles, meant only for each other. They both had tears in their eyes- not from sadness, or pain, or fear- just joy. Just two teenage boys who finally found home in each other’s company.

Keith gazed at him. “I love you.” He said honestly, lips still curved into a small, gentle smile. Lance laughed, his hands finding Keith’s. “I love you too, Keith. I love you!” He laughed again. “Man, it’s amazing to say that out loud.”

It was Keith’s turn to giggle. “You are not nearly as smooth as you think you are.”

“I dunno. You still fell for me, babe, so I obviously am.”

Keith melted internally at the name. “You’re an idiot. I love you.”

“I love you too. I’m so glad you came back, Keith. You were always… Well, okay, not always, but for the most part, you were there for me.” Lance said, smirking. Keith laughed. “We were there for each other. Always.”

Lance tentatively put an arm around his shoulder. “Can we… always be like that? There for each other, I mean. In every way.”

Keith leaned into him, smiling. “We already are.”

**Author's Note:**

> me: has 5029347092735 unfinished fics  
> me: hey lets do a oneshot
> 
> after that finale, i couldnt help it. it got me so emotional and i couldnt help but wonder what Lance's reaction wouldve been, you know? I know the first part of the story is a little bit awkward and OOC, but I guess I wanted to get to the real ~emotional~ part of it lmao. hope yall liked it!!
> 
> questions? comments? requests? hmu on my writing blog: dhillarearenn !


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